The Best Sex Toys I Tried in 2023

It’s been kind of a rough year, but at least the orgasms were amazing

Okay, so let me start by saying that this hasn’t been my sexiest year.

I did my best to keep my thoughts sexy and my mind dirty, but it hasn’t been easy.

There was a bout of burnout that gave me severe fatigue and brain fog. I had to get a lot of new hobbies I could do in bed. But unless you count my dirty coloring books, none of them were X-rated.

Then Mr. Austin and I discovered a whole new level of busy we didn’t know existed. That meant a lot less alone time with my husband - and a lot fewer opportunities for him to charm his way into my pajama pants.

I put in a lot of work trying to fool my libido into getting excited, but I’m pretty sure she’s getting wise to some of my tricks.

So yeah, it’s been a struggle.

There were still plenty of bright spots, though.

I started getting a handle on the anxiety that’s been suffocating my sex drive. That’s still a work in progress, but I can see the light at the end of the stressful tunnel.

I made peace with my pillow princess kink, which helped me get rid of some of the guilt that came with it.

I enjoyed my fair share of full body rubdowns. Some incredibly satisfying pussy massages, too.

And I had the pleasure of getting off with lots of incredibly fun sex toys.

Of all the new ones I played with, these were the ones that really stood out for me. They’re the ones that made me come the hardest and made all the effort I put into getting aroused totally worth my while.

We-Vibe Nova 2

The Nova 2 is one of those toys that takes the basic concept of a rabbit vibrator and finds a new way to perfect it.

Like other rabbit vibes, it’s got an insertable vibrating shaft so you give yourself lots of fantastic internal stimulation. And it’s got the vibrating rabbit ear that will tickle your clit while you’re enjoying all that great thrusting.

What makes this one special is its shape.

The curvy design makes it really comfortable to use and helps it hit all the right spots.

And the loopy external vibrator is flexible enough to move and bend while you play with it. That way, the vibrations stay on your clit no matter how enthusiastically you’re fucking yourself.

It’s a very pleasurable and highly reliable rabbit - and that’s something every lady needs.

Womanizer Wave

The day I found out that my showerhead could make me come was one of the best days of my life.

Because it’s really the perfect way to end a shower.

I’m already naked and wet. I’ve just touched and soaped myself all over. I feel all fresh and clean.

All I have to do is point the showerhead at the right angle, enjoy a really satisfying climax, and then wrap myself in a soft and fluffy towel.

How good it’s going to be will depend on the kind of showerhead you’re using, though.

I’ve tried basic ones that don’t let you pinpoint the spray, which weren’t stimulating enough. I’ve tried some so strong you feel almost like you’re getting towel whipped by the jets.

But this year, I finally got to a showerhead that was actually designed for masturbating. And let me tell you, you can really feel the difference.

The Womanizer Wave has great settings, including a swirly one that my clit just loves. Adjusting the pressure and the spray patterns is really easy and intuitive, too.

I’ve got it hooked to my shower hose right now and it’s going to stay there permanently - unless I move out of this house, then I’m definitely taking it with me.

Liberator Heart Wedge

Alright, I’ll be perfectly honest here. I just wanted this one because I love the way it looks.

I already had a Liberator Wedge and had a bunch of great action on top of it. I had a Ramp to go with it, too. Oh, and a really fun sex chair.

I had plenty of great things to fuck on. Arguably, I didn’t need to add the Heart Wedge to the mix.

Except I sort of did. Because I mean, look at it - it’s cute as hell!

And now that I have it, I’ve got zero regrets.

Because unlike my regular wedge, it doesn’t look out of place on my bed. I can keep it out and it seems perfectly innocent - even though it’s made for fucking.

But also, it turns out this is exactly the upgrade my bed needed.

It’s got a lot of lift, which was almost tricky at first - wedging it under my hips didn’t happen as gracefully as I hoped it would.

That didn’t matter one bit, though. Because as soon as I was on top of it, it was like I was being fucked in technicolor.

The way it shifted my body turned the pussy eating up to eleven. It gave Mr. Austin perfect access so his tongue could hit all the right spots.

It created a great angle for ass eating, too. That’s not something I’d normally get to enjoy while lying on my back - that’s usually more of a hands-and-knees experience. But with the heart wedge, it’s a breeze.

And it basically bent my legs back for me, but in an ergonomically friendly way. Which means even my fragile body can enjoy some exceptionally deep dick without regretting it for a week.

The fact that it’s shaped like a cute little heart just makes it more playful and discreet.

Strap-On-Me Silicone Cum Dildo

I had been on a little side quest to find a great squirting dildo.

I wanted one that worked decently as a dick but could still blow a good load without too much effort.

And I finally found one that checks all my boxes.

I’d be thrilled with the Strap-On-Me Silicone Cum Dildo even if it couldn’t blast any spunk. It’s got a nice size, a lovely smooth texture, and it’s super soft - everything I want in an artificial dick.

It also works with a syringe. After trying squirting dildos with buttons and bulbs, I really think this is the way to go. It’s simple to use, it’s easy to keep the tubing out of sight, and it gives you big, powerful cumshots.

It’s simple, messy, and as fun as a dildo that shoots artificial loads should be.

A-Play Rise

Ever since I discovered the wonderful world of thrusting dildos, I’ve wanted one for my ass.

But every time I got a new thruster, I couldn’t bear to make it my official butt banging machine. I knew I’d want to give my pussy plenty of rides, so I kept my backside out of it.

So, I decided to get one that’s just for buttstuff. That way, I’d be able to give my ass all the thrusting it desires without making my pussy jealous.

I poked around, checked out different options, and settled on the A-Play Rise.

It looked like it would have a decent reach, a good thrust, and a few vibration settings - definitely a plus. It was more of a thrusting buttplug than a dildo, but that just meant I wouldn’t have to hold it in place or find a surface to stick it on.

And to my very pleasant surprise, it was everything I wanted and more.

It gave me the kind of thrusting I really wanted. The vibrations were incredibly pleasurable. But more importantly, it hit some spots that I frankly didn’t even know I had.

As much as I love getting all horned up and asking my husband to slip it in, this was on a whole other level. Even his wonderful dick has never managed to deliver the kind of stimulation the A-Play Rise does.

Needless to say, it won me over instantly - anything that can give me anal orgasms that strong would.

Magic Wand Micro

When I was waiting for the Magic Wand Micro to show up in my mailbox, I kept telling myself it was just a novelty toy - nothing more.

I wanted to make sure I didn’t get my hopes up.

The Magic Wand Mini was the best toy I tried the year before, so I was thrilled to get to try a new version of it.

But I also knew this tiny little version might not even come close to matching it. For all I knew, it would be really cute to look at but not all that impressive when it was between my legs.

Well, I’m happy to say I was wrong about that.

It’s as cute as I thought it would be, but it’s also a really good vibrator. It’s small, but the wand-shaped head means it covers a lot of surface area. And the vibrations are pretty powerful for the size.

I still prefer the Magic Wand Mini overall. But the Micro is a really fantastic pocket-sized toy that’s more stimulating than it looks.

Lovense Vulse

I was nuts for the Lovense Lush the moment I tried it.

It’s a bit of an odd duck - a remote controlled vibrating egg with an antenna sticking out one end. But it works wonders.

It doesn’t vibrate super powerfully, but wearing it and letting it buzz my G-spot gets me aroused like nobody’s business. Using it is the closest I’ve come to fulfilling my lifelong dream of becoming an impressionable horny puppet.

And what’s cool about the Vulse is that it’s basically an updated version of the Lush.

But instead of only giving internal vibrations, it also thrusts and bumps against your G-spot.

It’s just as discreet as the Lush. Wearing it is a major turn on, too.

And being able to let someone thrust your G-spot from a distance is reason enough to keep this toy fully charged and ready to go.

Britney 2.0

Last year, I fully embraced my identity as a doll fucker.

I already sort of knew I was one. I’ve always wanted to get my hands and mouth on one of those life-size hotties.

But it took Britney to really bring out that side of me.

She’s an amazing torso doll by Tantaly, with all the features I needed. Not too heavy. Curvy and nicely detailed. A rack that jiggles and a butt that pops.

We were still in our honeymoon period when I found out that she was being replaced by a new and improved model.

Britney 2.0 still has everything I loved about OG Britney, but with a few tweaks.

Her tits have an even more realistic feel. Her pussy lips, collarbones, and bellybutton became a bit more defined. And her holes were moved a smidge to make fucking her feel more natural.

I would’ve been more than happy squeezing and spanking Britney for the rest of my days. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with the original model - she’s a very fine lady through and through.

But I gotta say, she’s even better since her makeover.

Another Year of Awesome Orgasms

Every year, I worry that sex toys have peaked.

I tally up all my new favorites, talk about how much fun they are, and I can’t help but wonder if that’s as good as it’s going to get.

Surely, they can’t get any better. After experiencing those intense anal orgasms with the A-Play Rise, I can’t imagine anything treating my butt better than it does.

But so far, I’ve been wrong.

Each year has been filled with cool new sex toy designs, toys that blow my mind in brand new ways, and new favorites that earn a spot in my nightstand.

I mean jeez, they even made a Britney 2.0. Clearly, anything’s possible.

So, I’m really looking forward to discovering lots of new toys over the next twelve months.

But even if I make it to January without finding anything better than the ones I’ve tried this year, that’s honestly fine. Because these are all toys you could settle down with and have a very happy and highly orgasmic life.

This post contains affiliate links to all my favorite new toys. If you click on one and treat yourself to anything from the site, I earn a small commission and you’ll be enjoying some of the best toys out there! And be sure to use the code LOVEEMMA at checkout to save 15% on your entire order from Betty’s Toy Box!

If you liked this article, you should totally check out the Pillow Humpers and Stuffie Fuckers (Grinding, Pillow Porn, and Recreational Humping) episode of my dirty and intimate sex podcast, Pillow Talk With Emma Austin!