Netflix’s 365 Days Sequel Went Too Far

Watching 365 Days: This Day made me feel like a prude

Note: this post contains nudity (you’re welcome!)

When I think of my favorite 90s movies, I think about all the sex in them.

Cruel Intentions activated all of my teenage hormones. I watched Wild Things for the same reason everyone watched Wild Things. The erotic thrillers I kept popping into my parents’ VCR were basically the perfect form of entertainment.

Then all the sex went away.

I have no idea why, but somewhere along the way to the 2010s movies got a lot less steamy.

Thankfully, it’s been making a comeback.

Fifty Shades of Grey came out in 2015. And even though it wasn’t perfect, it was hot - and that counts for something.

Since then, new erotic thrillers with overacting, dark lighting, and honest to goodness sex scenes have been showing up on streaming services.

And because of shows like Sex/Life, Minx, and Euphoria, we’re finally getting a decent dose of full frontal nudity.

Not everyone’s happy about it, though.

A little while ago, there was a debate on Twitter about sex scenes in movies.

I don’t think I saw the tweet that started it all, but apparently the gist of it was that you don’t actually need to show sex in movies. There are so many ways to imply it, so doing anything more than that is gratuitous.

That’s when people started picking sides.

The anti-sex-scene crowd thew up their praise hand emojis.

Timid people said they were fine with sex scenes as long as they’re relevant to the plot - whatever that means.

And then there was everyone else. All the people who don’t mind seeing a boob or two, even if it doesn’t move the plot ahead. The ones who like seeing passion played out, not just a morning after scene to imply that sex took place.

The ones who are happy to finally see dicks on TV - even if a lot of them aren’t even real.

Why is "sex scenes are pointless" a storytelling take that I see every other day now? Do I need to explain smut to you? Is that where we're at? I need to inform you that a lot of people find it fun to watch sexy people mime some hot banging?
— Dan Olson (@FoldableHuman) December 30, 2020

You can probably guess which side I’m on.

I want more sex, a bunch of tits, and as many butts as they want to throw in there. Show me some pussy too while you’re at it. And a good dose of cock would be a-ok with me - real ones, please.

People get naked in real life. They expose their bodies to turn each other on. They fuck too - and sometimes it’s intense as all hell.

It just makes sense to show that on screen.

Thrillers don’t skip the suspense because they could just imply that something scary went down. Comedies show you all the goofy hijinx instead of just insinuating that funny things happened.

Why should sex be any different?

If there’s any sex going on in the storyline, I want to see it - all of it. The more the better.

At least, that’s what I thought.

This week, Netflix released the sequel to 365 Days and watching it gave me a thought I’ve never had before in my entire life.

“There’s too much sex in this movie.”

How We Got Into This Mess

All the hype around 365 Days was that it would be the next Fifty Shades of Grey - a mainstream movie with a hot rich guy who happens to be into BDSM.

We were all charging our vibrators because we kept being told that this was going to be steamy as can be.

Then it came out and the conversation changed immediately. A lot of people didn’t find the movie erotic - they just found it fucked up.

That’s because it’s about a Sicilian gangster named Massimo (played by Michele Morrone) who falls in love with Laura (Anna-Maria Sieklucka) after catching a glimpse of her. And instead of courting her like a gentleman, he tracks her down, kidnaps her, and gives her 365 days to fall in love with him.

He ties her up a few times, roughs her up, and has a bunch of not-quite-consensual sex with her.

It’s not played as violent, though. It’s eroticized and romanticized. And that really bothered a lot of people.

Not me, though.

I’m extremely strict when it comes to real life consent. But this is fiction and fantasy. It plays by completely different rules.

The movie still bugged me, but if anything it’s because they drop the dubious consent way too quickly. Laura falls for Massimo so fast it’s like she got amnesia and forgot why she’s tied up in his bed. She didn’t even need 365 days to fall for him - a few hard fucks and she was good.

There’s some more plot, but none of it was memorable or even made much sense.

The movie kind of sucked, but it didn’t matter. It gave us what we wanted - forbidden temptation, bare skin, bondage, and fuck scenes galore. The storyline was just an excuse to show us more of that.

Please Just Stop Fucking for One Minute

Last week, I saw the announcement for the 365 Days sequel.

I was kind of excited because I have a very hard time resisting trashy erotica.

But I was bracing myself for disappointment because I was sure they’d tone down the sex. Once you get to know the characters and are invested in what happens to them, you don’t usually get to see them fuck as often.

Well, I was very wrong about that. The sequel definitely ramps up the sex.

And turns out I was wrong to think that’s what I wanted. Because all that fucking actually ruined the movie.

365 Days ended with a cliffhanger. Massimo finds out that Laura is about to be killed by some of his rivals and we have to wait two years to find out how she manages to survive.

Except we never do.

365 Days: This Day opens with Massimo fucking Laura in her wedding dress - until Laura’s friend Olga (Magdalena Lamparska) catches them.

So, Laura’s alive and well and still taking that kidnapper dick. She made it out somehow, but we’re never told how.

Then they get married over some knockoff Ed Sheeran ballad and they’re off to enjoy their wedding night.

“You have one hour,” Massimo tells Laura - presumably because he’s still in his refractory period from the pre-wedding sex. “Then, I’ll do whatever I want with you.”

“No,” she replies. “I’ll do whatever I want with you.”

And what she wants to do to him is sit him in a chair, tie his wrists to it with her stockings, and make him watch while she masturbates. She gets herself off with a Lelo Soraya Wave because she’s a fancy lady - and hey, good on her for packing a vibrator for her wedding night.

Massimo watches helplessly, tugging against those stockings until she leans over him and says “I want you to fuck me the way I like.” And I guess the girl likes a bit of primal play, because that’s his cue to tear through the restraints and pin her to the bed.

Okay, so we’ve had the sex, the wedding, and then some more sex. Time for some kind of storyline, right?

Right!?

No such luck. Before we get to that, we have to watch Domenico (Otar Saralidze) try to seduce Olga while a budget version of Shape of You graces our ears.

Then cut to Massimo and Laura golfing seductively.

Yeah, I didn’t think you could do that either. But there she is, pole dancing with the little flag before he grips his stiff putter and sends the ball gently rolling between her legs. Even though she’s used to the Soraya’s vibrations, that little tap against her skirt gives her some kind of quasi-pleasurable reaction.

That’s it. No dialogue. No point. Just sex golf.

Then they walk in on Olga covering Domenico’s body in cream, fruit, and honey. That doesn’t lead to sex, though. Mostly banter and a bit of conversation between the ladies.

Then wham bam, Massimo’s back to banging his ma’am - this time on their luxurious kitchen table and in his fancy little living room.

At this point, I’m just hoping for a little bit of plot, as a treat. Some kind of story - any kind, really. But it’s too much to ask - instead, Laura walks in on Domenico fucking Olga against a counter.

I’m glad the little underdog finally gets to give her his bone, but come on.

The ladies drive, walk, and brunch. They talk about nothing much until Massimo shows up, breaks up their fun, and makes Laura leave with him.

She angrily tells him that she doesn’t want to be controlled and that being with him is like being in prison. Which isn’t much of a shocker since he literally wooed her by keeping her captive.

Cue the sexy gardener (Simone Susinna) with beefy muscles, sleeve tattoos, and a cap with a rooster on it - in case you somehow miss the fact that he’s cocky.

You assume she’s going to fuck him because that’s all anyone does in this movie. But she manages to keep it in her pants and just looks at him like she wishes he’d pounce on her - you know, the way she likes it.

Then it’s Christmas for some reason and Massimo gives Laura a clothing store as a gift because rich people are gonna rich. And her gift to him is - yeah, it’s more sex.

She’s wearing “fuck me” wrist cuffs - like, they literally say “fuck” and “me” on the straps. And she laid out a few accessories for him to use - a collar and leash, some bondage rope, and even more Lelo toys because rich people are gonna rich.

He doesn’t use the leash or the Ora, which is a shame. But he does buzz her clit with the Soraya while he fucks her, then slides a buttplug in her ass before pounding her from behind.

I feel bad complaining because I’m genuinely happy to see some anal action in a movie. Even happier that it’s double penetration.

I just wish there was more context for it than some sex golf and a bunch of pop ballads.

What the Hell Is Going on Here?

Fifty one minutes. That’s how long it took before I felt like something actually happened in this movie - something that moved the story along.

After that, there’s actually a discernible plot. It’s about as thin as Laura’s barely-there wedding dress, but after about an hour of sex and nonsense I was happy to have it.

I’m not going to bother telling you about the second half of the movie. There are plot twists you’d normally only see in soap operas, confusing dialogue, moments that make me wonder if the gardener is fucking his sister, and even more sex scenes.

But by that point, I had given up. I was going through the motions - finishing the movie just because I had started it and I wanted it to disappear from my “Continue Watching” list.

I’m not hard to please, and this had so many ingredients that would have normally made me very happy.

Hot guys with tattooed hands who eat pussy.

Sex toys and double penetration.

A gentle hint of taboo sister fucking.

Watching this should have turned me on. But instead it made me feel like a prude. I was starting to get annoyed at all the sex scenes and the plot that was going nowhere.

The first half of the movie doesn’t even feel like a movie. It’s more like a music video - just a lot of visuals thrown together because they’re fun or sexy or whatever.

Honestly, if you had told me I was watching clips from ten different movies that had been spliced together, I would believe you.

I still want more sex scenes in thrillers. I want to see lots of tits, dicks, and pussies in the shows I watch.

But this week, I learned that I’ve got a limit. Turns out I kind of want the sex and nudity to be relevant to the plot after all.

At the very least, I want there to be an actual plot to begin with.

There Are Better Ways to Spend Your Time

Whenever I watch an erotic thriller, I can’t help but compare it to porn.

The quality of the acting. The production and the set design. The overall cinematic quality. The thrillers usually win, but porn comes pretty damn close.

Not this time, though. Porn blows 365 Days: This Day clear out of the water.

The acting is more believable. The dialogue is more natural. And a proper porn scene isn’t going to make you wait close to an hour before giving you a plot.

Porn is going to give you a context for what you’re seeing on the screen. The performers will give you a decent idea of what kind of characters they’re playing. There’s going to be a clear setup and an actual buildup to the sex. By the time you’re watching the fucking, you at least know why they’re doing it.

Sometimes the storyline is as simple as it gets.

An Amish girl wants to know what all this sex stuff is about - and she’s found a guy who is more than happy to give her a hands-on lesson.

A lonely girl hitting up a hottie for some casual sex accidentally group texts her way into getting gangbanged.

The slumber party pillow fights and dares turn into makeout sessions and way more.

That’s really all you need - and it’s what’s missing from This Day.

If you’re tempted to watch it, you’re way better off putting on an erotic movie from the mid-90s instead.

Or at the very least, cozy up with some porn. It won’t have any golf sex, but there’s no shortage of tattooed guys who eat pussy. And if you really want to see a gardener fuck his stepsister, you can probably find that too.

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If you liked this article, you should totally check out the Unsolicited Sexual Advice (Rating Dicks, Next Level Anal, and Daddy Dom 101) episode of my dirty and intimate sex podcast, Pillow Talk With Emma Austin!