Netflix’s 365 Days Is Troubling

But not for the reasons you think

Lots of people have been talking about the movie 365 Days because of its massive consent issues and its explicit softcore sex scenes.

365 Days is an adaptation of a novel inspired by Fifty Shades of Grey, and the movie has been compared to that film series.

That’s almost always presented as a critique. But I happen to be a defender of the Fifty Shades series, so I got excited to watch the film and see if it lived up to its promise - or was at least kinky and erotic enough to give me two hours of steamy distraction.

The concept behind the movie is simple. (Heads up: minor spoilers ahead.)

Massimo (played by Michele Morrone) is some sort of rich and powerful gangster who falls in love with a woman named Laura (Anna-Maria Sieklucka) seeing her exactly once.

Because he caught sight of her right before having a near death experience, he spends five years obsessing over her.

As luck would have it, he finally encounters her again. When he does, he declares his undying love for her in the most gangster-y way possible - by kidnapping her.

Massimo tells the bewildered Laura that she will live in captivity for a year and that he is giving her those 365 days to fall in love with him.

It’s not clear what happens if she still isn’t feeling it after the end of her lock-in. Is she going to be released and taken back home? Is she going to “disappear” (if you know what I mean)? Is he going to pull a dick move and insist on keeping her an extra 365 days?

Who knows.

What we do know, though, is that his plan to win her over involves lots of really dominant stuff.

He gives her commands and orders her around. He manhandles her at his pleasure. He gets rough when she defies him.

He tells her that he won’t force her to do anything she doesn’t want to do (minus the whole enforced captivity thing) but then continues to get really physical with her. His promise feels especially hollow when he wraps his hand around her throat in frustration.

This being an erotic romance, it doesn’t take long for Laura to be won over and to decide to make the best of her captivity. She shrugs the sketchiness off because, hey, she found herself a hot rich dude and she didn’t even have to put up with Tinder fuckbois and desperate dudes on OK Cupid to get him.

Lots of people have been taking issue with the whole premise of the movie due to its obvious consent issues.

And, yeah, the consent is essentially absent. Even the guys who don’t look for an enthusiastic “yes” and just hope their dates don’t give them a firm “no” are usually aware that kidnapping ain’t cool.

I have lots of issues with the movie, too. But the lack of consent in it isn’t one of them. I’m perfectly fine with it. In fact, when I found out about the premise, I didn’t feel repulsed - I got curious. I wanted to see how they played it.

If anything, one of my problems with the movie is that they didn’t play it hard enough.

Fantasies Don’t Need Consent

Lack of consent is an extremely serious issue - but not in fiction or fantasy.

Questionable consent is all over the place. Romance novels are full of that kind of stuff - like men grabbing and kissing women who express reluctance or show resistance, but melt under that pure mass of manliness.

Romantic comedies are the same. So many of the grand, romantic gestures in those would be kind of creepy in real life. Those stories exist in a universe where you win someone over by borderline stalking them - and the stalking and obsession is played off as sweet and loving.

Porn scenarios lean on that sort of thing, too. A lot of it is playful, like stuck porn. Some of it is darker, like the films released by Pure Taboo.

And no, you shouldn’t bang your stepsister when she’s stuck in the dyer. But that’s part of the point of fiction. You can escape into fantasies you wouldn’t be able to enjoy in reality.

Fictional scenarios give your imagination, your emotions, and your horniness free rein to explore whatever the hell it wants, and I think that’s great.

I’m also bothered by the double standard I see surrounding 365 Days and Fifty Shades of Grey.

We allow ourselves all the romantic fantasies we want, even the ones that would be upsetting in reality. But when it’s a sexual fantasy, it’s deemed wrong or inappropriate.

Most people also don’t have a problem with enjoying some really disturbing stuff when they escape into a horror film or a violent thriller. We all know how to separate our enjoyment of that entertainment from our real-life desires. But for some reason, there’s a lot of suspicion when it comes to anything erotic.

On top of that, rape and kidnapping fantasies are quite common with women. I don’t personally have them, but I understand why so many people do.

In some cases, it’s an extension of control play - you can fantasize about having control taken away from you in a very intense way.

It can get you really excited if you’re turned on by aggressive or rough sex.

It’s also a way to explore your dirtiest fantasies without feeling guilty or ashamed for having them. By making it a rape scenario, you can get off to whatever you want without confronting the fact that you desire it.

And non-consent fantasies can just be about someone giving you exactly what you want and what you need without having to ask them for it.

I understand that the kind of behavior depicted in 365 Days would be incredibly problematic if it happened in real life. But it didn’t. It was just the product of an author’s imagination and we all get to enjoy the make believe along with her.

Nuh Uh, Baby Girl

So, I’m fine with the kidnapping and the whole setup for the movie. But I still had a lot of issues with it.

The first one is the claim that this is the next Fifty Shades or that it’s similar to that series in some ways.

And yes, there are definitely elements of Fifty Shades in this movie, for sure. In fact, there are set pieces that are straight up ripped from the original. So much so that they feel completely out of place, like when Massimo takes Laura to a masked ball, which is a weird thing to shove into a kidnapping story.

But that’s where most of the similarities end.

First off, there’s the way the movie handles kink. It’s like it wants to be kinky but can’t sustain it.

Things are hella intense at first, with the hardcore manhandling and the fact that she’s held against her will. It escalates from there and we eventually get to enjoy a legitimate bondage scene.

By the second act of the film, though, that element is dropped entirely. At first, Massimo practically threatens Laura with control and brutality. He ties her up and straps her to a four post bed. He makes her watch him get head from some other lady. But after that, the sex goes fully vanilla for some reason.

Passionate and intense, yes. But no more bondage gear, no more domination, and no more pushing Laura’s limits.

That’s fine. I can leave the BDSM behind to enjoy other kinds of hot sex scenes. It’s everything else that was a bigger let down.

The thing that bothered me the most is Massimo’s pet name for Laura. The moment they meet, before she even has any idea who he is or what’s going on, he refers to her as “baby girl.”

Pet names can be hot. That one wasn’t.

It felt completely unearned. There was no backstory to the name. It didn’t come out organically from their banter or their relationship. It was just something he slapped on her.

It’s not a good fit, either. Laura is not anyone’s baby girl. It’s just not her personality. That’s the kind of name a daddy dom might use with his little, but it’s not the right pet name for a self-assured, combative, defiant woman.

That’s not the only thing that felt unearned. Most of the turns in the movie did. Laura goes full Stockholm syndrome and falls for her captor. But it happens very abruptly. I can go along with a captive woman overcoming resistance and getting hot for the guy who kidnapped her, but the amount of suspension of disbelief I’d need takes time to build up.

It’s hard to even tell what changes her mind or how he wins her over. There was no Beauty and the Beast moment where you can practically see Belle’s heart soften. (There’s another kidnapping romance, by the way.)

There were also so many tonal shifts that it seemed like three or four movies had been puzzle-pieced together.

At times, it was a dark erotic thriller, right down to Massimo appearing in frame like a horror movie villain. Then, it would shift to romantic comedy vibes that would’ve been at home in Pretty Woman, like when Laura tries on outfits while Massimo looks bored and overwhelmed by the sassy lady he kidnapped.

And I wished the plot hadn’t been abandoned so quickly. The draw of the movie is the premise - the 365 day deal that gives the film its title.

But instead of 365 days, we get a few weeks. And instead of a slow burning passion, we get a quick switch to a basic romantic plot.

I Have No Regrets

Sadly, 365 Days didn’t live up to its promise. It didn’t even manage to stay as intense (or just plain tense) as the sexy captivity plot line would have you believe.

But I have no regrets. I’m fine not getting my two hours back because there were a lot of things I enjoyed about it.

First and foremost, the only truly kinky sex scene is hot. It’s got voyeurism, cuckqueaning, a fairly explicit blowjob, a set of restraints, and desire that builds to a fever point without a full release (I am all for a movie trying to edge me).

And as much as it phoned in most of the sexual tension, it’s still an erotic film and there really aren’t enough of them these days.

There’s also an off-hand remark about Maslow’s Pyramid of Needs when Laura excuses herself to go to the restroom, which amused me so much I made sure to write it down.

If you really wanted to, you could even take a shot every time Massimo calls Laura his “baby girl” so you’re nice and tipsy by the time the credits roll.

It was also really fun to laugh at some of the dialog, the weird filming decisions, and even to try and pick apart why every sex scene is lit in a completely different color.

And if anyone really gets off to this movie, I think that’s just great. Dig in. Eat it up. Jill off to all the boat sex. Your fantasies might not be as consensual as real sex should be, but it’s all good, baby girl.

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If you liked this article, you should totally check out the Claim That Pussy (Creampies, Breeding, and Squirting Dildos) episode of my dirty and intimate sex podcast, Pillow Talk With Emma Austin!