8 Things She Secretly Wants You to Do in Bed (But Is Too Shy to Tell You)
These little moves will make sex so much hotter
There’s this complaint I’ve had a few times over the years.
When I write an article about what ladies want in bed, I’ll hear from men who will tell me they’ve got a real simple solution to all this. If women want sex a certain way, they should just ask for it.
There. Easy peasy. Takes all the guesswork right out of fucking.
And yeah, there’s definitely some truth to that. If you can tell your partner exactly what turns you on, gets you off, and makes you feel extra satisfied, you’re bound to have a better time.
But I also know it’s never that simple.
Good sexual communication is important. It’s how you set boundaries, give your partner a general idea of what you’re into, and switch things up when things aren’t going so great in the middle of sex.
But getting really specific about what you want can be really difficult for a lot of people.
Telling someone all about your turn-ons can feel really vulnerable. A lot of people are embarrassed by their desires and don’t want to feel like there’s a spotlight shining right on them.
It’s also really tough if you don’t have a super precise idea of what you want. If you want to hear more dirty talk or try out different positions, that’s pretty straightforward. But sometimes what you want is more like an attitude or a vibe than a specific action. Even when you know exactly what you’re looking for, it can be really hard to put it into words.
And then there are the things you don’t actually want to ask for, because asking kind of ruins it. Sort of like asking someone for a compliment - it takes the sincerity and spontaneity out of it. And that sincerity and spontaneity might be what makes it hot in the first place.
So yeah, ideally your partner would give you a really clear roadmap for how to blow her mind. But until that happens, here are a few things you should try out when you’re fucking her.
Kiss Her Neck
Kissing her on the lips is sweet and romantic. It can even be sexy. And if there’s some dry humping during your makeout session, that’s just hot as fuck.
But kisses on the neck feel completely different. They feel more intense, like you’re kissing her somewhere sensitive.
It’s incredibly arousing - even if she’s not rubbing her crotch against yours.
So, start there. You’ll get around to licking her nipples. You’ll bury your face into her pussy. But before that, you should be turning her on with neck kisses.
Pin Her Wrists Down
If you’re fucking her and your hands are free, you should be using them.
Use them to touch her. You can grab her thighs or gently spank her ass. And you’ve got to find ways to stroke her clit.
But there’s something special about pinning her wrists down.
The other things you can do with your hands all feel really good and sexy. But the wrist pin makes you seem more dominant and helps her feel more submissive. And that’s something most women crave - big time.
It’s basically a bit of light bondage. Except instead of using cuffs or restraints, you’re using your own grip.
Even if you’re already doing some good old fashioned bondage, the wrist pin is still a hot move. It makes you seem strong and powerful. It’s you making use of your hands for her, which is always incredibly attractive.
Start simple by pinning her wrists down when you’re fuck her missionary style. If she’s really into it, you can try more advanced moves - like holding her wrists behind her back while you plow her from behind. And if being submissive really gets her going, she might want you to hold her wrists above her head while you gently fuck her mouth too.
Whisper Some Praise
I’m a big fan of dirty talk, and I think everyone should be doing more of it.
Hearing it is incredibly arousing. Saying it makes you feel like you’re really in the moment. It just makes sex so much fucking better.
And there’s no better dirty talk than praise.
Praise won’t just make her horny - it will also make her feel appreciated and desired.
It also brushes away all the quiet little worries and insecurities she has. When you tell her that you can’t get enough of her ass, that you love the way she strokes your cock, that her pussy feels fucking incredible, she gets to feel skilled and sexy. It gives her clear confirmation that you’re really into her and everything she’s doing, so she can just be in the moment and enjoy everything so much more.
And it’s the perfect kind of dirty talk for anyone who isn’t comfortable being degraded, which is most people.
Tell Her She Tastes and Smells Good
Okay, this is technically just more praise. But I need to mention it separately because it’s extra important.
Praising her pussy when you’re going down on her is a big deal because it’s something a lot of women are really self-conscious about. Some women can’t even fully enjoy oral sex because of it.
So, don’t even give her a chance to feel that way.
When you’re going down on her, tell her that she tastes amazing. You can tell her you love the way she smells too. At the very least, tell her you fucking love licking her pussy.
It might not sound like much, but it makes a huge difference and will genuinely help her get off.
Play With Her Hair When She’s Blowing You
Giving head can be really fucking hot. But it’s going to be so much better for her if it feels like you’re fully in it.
Moaning and groaning when she’s sucking you just right works. Talking dirty while your dick’s in her mouth is a great move too.
But there’s something really nice about physical touch.
It helps her feel appreciated when she’s working so hard to pleasure you. It makes her feel physically connected to you - even more than having your cock between her lips does. It makes you feel less distant, which makes the blowjob feel less one-sided.
So, play with her hair when she’s going down on you. That way, she’s more likely to feel like the blowjob is part of her fun too - not just yours.
Moan and Groan
Some guys fuck super quietly, like they’re trying to be sex ninjas.
And it’s just not as hot.
That’s not just my personal opinion. It’s one of the major sex complaints women have.
There are exceptions here and there. Like, if you’re trying to be really sneaky then sure, go ahead and stay hushed.
The rest of the time, you shouldn’t hold back. Groan when something feels really good. Grunt when you’re pounding her and getting really into it. Make whatever animal sounds you want to make when you’re coming.
And definitely, absolutely, one hundred percent let out a moan the moment your cock slides into her pussy.
Sex noises just plain sound great. They make fucking extra arousing. They make you seem way more enthusiastic and present. And they make her feel extra sexy.
There’s just no downside, so don’t hold back.
Use Lube
For whatever reason, a lot of guys are hesitant to use lube.
They’re down to use some for anal. They might be into flavored lube because it encourages extra blowjobs. But it’s like it doesn’t occur to them for anything else.
And that’s a shame, because lube is a lot of fun. It makes fingering feel more stimulating. It makes penetration feel better.
It makes everything nice and slippery, enhances pleasure, and it’s just a good time all around.
But a lot of women either have to get the bottle themselves, ask for it, or just do without. Because the guys they fuck don’t offer to use any.
So don’t be that guy. Make lube the default. Use it when you’re rubbing her pussy and maybe add some more when you’re ready to fuck her.
It’s going to feel good, but it will also show her that you care about her pleasure. It’s going to make you seem considerate too, which is going to make you even more attractive.
Use Her Sex Toys on Her
If you’re not using sex toys when you’re messing around together, you should definitely start.
It gives you lots of new ways to have fun together. It lets you explore all sorts of intense fantasies, like double penetration or pet play. It will help you give her mindblowing orgasms that make her fall in love with you and your dick all over again.
And if you’re already fooling around with sex toys, you should make sure you’re the one using them on her.
She can do it herself, obviously. She’s perfectly capable of holding a wand vibrator to her clit, thrusting a dildo inside her, or slipping in a buttplug. But it has a completely different effect when you’re the one doing it.
It can make sex feel more playful. It can make her feel taken care of. It keeps her from having to multitask the entire time you’re fucking. It makes her feel like it’s you rocking her world, not the toys.
It can also give her different sensations, and let her really focus on how amazing everything feels.
Using her toys on her will make sex really fun, dirty, and exciting. And it just doesn’t get any better than that.
Bang Her Like a Stud
You should still make sure you’ve got great sexual communication. You’ve got to - it’s the only way to have an amazing sex life.
Talk about your needs. Share your fantasies. Make your boundaries clear. All that good stuff.
But these are really simple and easy moves that pretty much every single living, breathing woman fucking loves. And because none of them are intense or extreme, you can just go ahead and work them into the way you fuck.
She might have never explicitly asked you to do any of them. But don’t be surprised if she ends up begging you for more.
This post contains affiliate links to some awesome lubes and amazing sex toys. If you click on one and treat yourself to anything from the site, I earn a small commission and you’ll be ready to blow her mind like never before! And be sure to use the code LOVEEMMA at checkout to save 15% on your entire order!
If you liked this article, you should totally check out the Raw Doggin’ 100 (Sex Games, Drunken Nonsense, and Non-Stop Pitching) episode of my dirty and intimate sex podcast, Pillow Talk With Emma Austin!
