8 Bad Blowjob Tips You Should (Almost) Never Follow
Ignore these and give great head
So many women have blowjob anxiety.
We all want to be really good at sex, but there’s just something that feels special about giving really good head.
It’s what you do when you want to impress a guy you like.
It’s a perfect way to show your appreciation for a partner who is really fucking good at making you come.
It’s a great way to show off just how dirty you can be.
For a lot of us, being able to give a good blowjob is kind of a big deal.
And that’s why there are so many blowjob tips online. We’re worried that we suck at sucking, so we can’t resist checking out the advice.
I definitely couldn’t. I clicked on every blowjob article I could find because I wasn’t confident that I knew what I was doing with my mouth. I got the basic idea, but I wanted to better than that.
And I found some genuinely useful advice. I learned a few things that made me a better cocksucker, helped me show more enthusiasm when there’s a dick in my mouth, and taught me about some accessories that made sucking even more fun.
But I also found some surprisingly common tips that were only worth ignoring.
Some were questionable. Others were just plain wrong. And most of them are more likely to ruin your experience instead of turning you into a bad girl who loves to slob on a knob.
These are the ones I still come across regularly - and why you shouldn’t listen to them, even if you want to blow his socks off.
Suppress Your Gag Reflex
There are different ways to train your gag reflex.
Some people will tell you to practice on a dildo or even an unpeeled banana. Just slowly push it deeper into your mouth and relax your throat. Eventually you’ll start to bypass your gagging instinct.
Others swear by specific pressure points. You can apparently squeeze your thumb tightly, pinch it, or press it into your palm and you’ll be able to throat anything like a champ.
And once in a while, you’ll just be encouraged to practice directly on your partner’s cock. Just take it deep and suck it up, buttercup. Sooner or later, you’ll be able to take him so deep you’ll feel his balls on your lips.
I don’t actually think there’s anything wrong with any of those methods. If you really want to become a throat queen, learning to suppress your gag reflex will help make that dream come true.
What bothers me is the people who imply that you can’t give a good blowjob without opening up your throat.
That’s just not true.
Deepthroating just isn’t for everyone. Not every girl finds it hot to take as much dick as possible and even the thought of it can be uncomfortable.
And there are lots of great ways to stimulate a cock with your lips, tongue, and the inside of your mouth. Going any deeper than that is entirely optional - especially since all the most sensitive parts of the cock are right near the tip.
Plus, it’s really hard to give enthusiastic head if it feels like an uncomfortable chore. If that’s what doing your best not to gag feels like to you, then you’ll give a much better blowjob if you keep it shallow.
If you get super turned on by the idea of having a cock stuffed past the back of your tongue, that’s fucking awesome. Go for it. Squeeze your thumb as hard as you can and see if you can fit his entire shaft past your lips.
But if that’s not part of your fantasy, then don’t sweat it. Just lick, suck, and bob your head on his cock - that’s more than enough to show him an amazing time.
It’s Hotter if You Swallow
There are two versions of this tip.
The worst one implies that you’re doing it wrong unless you end the blowjob by gulping up your partner’s load. That it’s downright disrespectful to spit out his spunk.
It’s not.
Swallowing is a very personal decision that doesn’t really have anything to do with him. You might love him to bits and still not want him to come in your mouth. He might turn you on so much that the sound of his voice gets you wet, it doesn’t have to turn you into a swallower.
Having boundaries or preferences around swallowing is fine and it doesn’t make you worse at giving head.
The other version of this tip is that it’s fine to spit - but it’s way hotter if you swallow.
That’s better. It’s still wrong, though.
It’s true that swallowing can be incredibly hot. But it’s not the only game in town.
As an avid porn watcher, I can tell you there are lots of fun things you can do with come that can be just as arousing.
You can let him come in your mouth and then drool it out over your chin or spit it on your tits.
You can pull his dick out of your mouth when he’s about to burst and let him blow all over your face.
You can finish him with your hand and take his come on your chest, your stomach, or let it get all over your fingers.
Or you can let him bust all over himself or catch it in a towel if that’s your jam.
All of it is hot as hell.
What makes a finish hot isn’t that you make his come disappear like a spunk magician. It’s that you end the blowjob in a way that you find fun.
Being enthusiastic and excited about his climax is way hotter than forcing yourself to swallow. So always do it in a way you find enjoyable.
Suck Him Off to Keep Him Happy
There are a lot of really good reasons to give head.
Sucking cock comes naturally to me when I’m horny. When Mr. Austin gets me really worked up, I almost always get the urge to take him in my mouth.
Sometimes I’ll do it because I want to feel like a good girl. And sucking him off is a really simple way to get that feeling.
If I’ve got some new flavored lubes I’m excited to try, that could get me on my knees too.
You can do it because you’re feeling generous. Maybe doing it makes you feel spontaneous and dirty. It could be a way to tap into your submissive side.
If you’re going down because it feels fun, playful, sexy, hot, or even makes you feel proud, that’s awesome.
But according to multiple articles I’ve come across, that’s not good enough. Because blowjobs aren’t about having fun - they’re actually part of your wifely or girlfriendly duties.
Those articles claim that blowjobs are an essential part of relationship maintenance. If you don’t give regular head, your guy is bound to get bored of you. He’ll be less invested in your relationship. He’ll probably get kind of cold and emotionally distant. And don’t be surprised if he ends up cheating on you.
I can’t get down with that - not one bit.
Giving head out of obligation is one of the worst reason to do it.
It takes all the fun, the excitement, and the enthusiasm out of it. You can’t get turned on from sucking cock if it’s a chore you’re checking off your list.
It’s also the fastest way to lose interest in giving head altogether.
There’s no minimum number of blowjobs you need to give. If you want to do it every other day, that’s great. If you only get in a cocksucking mood every few months, that’s fine too.
All that matters is that you don’t put pressure on yourself to do it more often than you actually want to.
Make Eye Contact
Locking eyes with your partner while you’re going down on him can definitely be hot.
It can also be extremely awkward.
Some articles will tell you to be a good girl and look up at him while you’re giving him your best mouth moves. But blowjob eye contact is very much an individual preference.
It might drive him wild to look down and see your doe eyes peeping up at him while his cock is stuffed into your mouth. It could be the perfect blend of sweet and dirty.
He might also be into how intimate and emotionally intense it feels. Maybe it makes him feel desired to know that you don’t just want to suck him off - you want to take in his reaction too.
Or maybe it just makes him feel like he’s in his very own POV porn scene. Except it’s even better than that, because he can just enjoy it instead of having to awkwardly lean back and hold the camera steady.
But he’s just as likely to find it uncomfortable.
He might want to get a good look at the way you slob on his knob. He wants to see you lick his shaft, bob your head on his dick, and just see how cute you look when you’re drooling all over his cock.
Feeling like he’s being watched can spoil that voyeuristic experience.
And some people find any kind of sustained eye contact unsettling - and a little dick sucking doesn’t change that.
Then there’s how you feel about it.
You’re a big part of the blowjob and if looking up at him makes it less enjoyable for you, then you definitely shouldn’t push yourself to do it.
Same if it throws off your cocksucking game. Sometimes you just want to focus on his dick and tune out everything else.
Don’t overthink it. Go with whatever you both find comfortable.
It could be so much eye contact you barely blink during the blowjob.
It could be tasteful fleeting glances.
Or you could keep your eyes shut the entire time.
It’s all good.
Don’t Ignore His Balls
Pretty much every blowjob article is going to tell you not to neglect his balls. I’ve even written some myself.
But the truth is, you can give him a ball-free blowjob. And it’s not that big of a deal if you do.
For one thing, it’s another highly personal thing.
My husband’s a fan of ball play. He likes having his balls touched and stroked while he’s getting head. And he’s especially fond of having his balls licked or getting them in my mouth.
And then I’ve had some guys tell me that they’re not into it at all.
But even if you’re blowing a guy who loves a little ball action, it’s just not as essential as some people make it seem.
Some guys find it really stimulating. But you can give him way more stimulation by pleasuring the head of his cock.
Or it can be a dominant thing - they find it makes you look more submissive when you kneel a little lower and slobber on their balls. There are lots and lots of other ways to be super subby when giving a blowjob, though. With a little bondage and begging, you can give him all the dommy satisfaction he wants.
Some dudes just find it hot that a girl is dirty enough to not stop at the dick. But you can be his dirty little cocksucker just by making it sloppy, sucking him eagerly, and talking dirty.
So yes, pleasuring his balls is one way to make the blowjob feel next level. But it’s not the only one. And you can give phenomenal head without going past his shaft.
Then there’s the fact that you might just not be into his balls all that much.
I’d say most women are more or less indifferent about them. Some are a bit turned off by balls. Others are a little bit into them.
Mostly, we tend to accept them as part of the package but they’re never really the star of the show.
If you happen to fall a little more on the pro-ball side of that spectrum, then use that in your blowjobs. Suck his balls. Lick them enthusiastically. Rest them in your mouth while you stroke his shaft.
If you’re more neutral, you can give them a few strokes, cup them in your hand, or even tug on them gently if that’s his jam.
But if you’re not really into them, don’t feel the need to go out of your way to give his balls some attention. Just focus on his dick.
I promise you, there’s an almost zero percent chance that your guy will get bored of your blowjobs just because you leave his balls hanging.
Don’t Complain
I’ve seen this one show up in a few lists of blowjob tips. And I’m honestly shocked every time it comes up.
I mean, what a demeaning thing to even suggest. It’s basically telling women who don’t like giving head to do it anyway - and to be really friendly and sweet about it.
Gross.
They try to make it sound reasonable by framing it in terms of enthusiasm.
Blowjobs are better when you suck him eagerly. If he feels like you’re into it almost as much as he is, it’s going to be a major turn-on. He doesn’t really want reluctant head - he wants you to be excited to suck his cock.
All of those things are true.
But that doesn’t mean you should fake your enthusiasm. And you definitely shouldn’t push yourself to give head you don’t want to give.
If your urge is to complain because you feel like you’ve got to suck him off, that’s not a sign you should shut up about it. It’s a sign you should skip the blowjob - at least for now.
And the people telling women not to put up a fuss about sucking cock are glossing over the fact that a lot of women have perfectly valid reasons to complain.
I genuinely believe most women who are into men love giving head. But I also know that a lot of guys do things that ruin it for us.
Some of them are really pushy about using our mouths. Others are passive aggressive and whiny about not getting it - or not getting it enough.
There are guys who insist on making blowjobs obligatory - like there should never be any fucking without at least some sucking.
Others treat it like a transaction. They’re barely willing to give much pleasure unless they get a good amount of suction in return.
Then there are the dudes who expect it as a reward. They feel entitled to getting head for just about any gift, thoughtful gesture, or basic boyfriend behavior.
Some guys are too aggressive. They’ll push a girl’s head down or try to turn every blowjob into a facefuck - even if she’s not into that kind of thing.
Not to mention dudes whose bad ball hygiene makes the prospect of giving head extremely unappealing.
Those are all perfectly good reasons to complain about blowjobs - and there are more.
They’re not reasons for you to put on a brave face and suck him off without a fuss - they’re reasons to have an open and honest talk about the whole situation.
Blow Him to Completion
There are people who want to make you feel like a blowjob failure if you don’t make him come with your mouth.
I have no idea why so many people bring up this tip. I can only imagine they’ve never been on the receiving end of a death gripped cock.
There are guys who come almost as soon as you put your mouth on them.
Others will blast within a few minutes, especially if you give them some really intense tongue work.
But there are also guys who won’t come unless you give them sustained suction for ten minutes.
And then there are delayed ejaculators like my husband. He has multiple stories that involve him getting sucked off for half an hour or more - without even a drop of spunk to show for it.
Going all the way might not be a big deal if you guy comes quickly. If his cock isn’t sensitive, though, it can be an oral ordeal.
But even if he doesn’t have a bad case of death grip, it doesn’t matter. You can stop blowing whenever you want.
Giving a blowjob gets uncomfortable after a while - your lips get sore, your jaw starts to ache, your neck feels cramped, your knees start to hurt. And unless you really want to, there’s no reason to keep sucking him past that point.
It can get boring too. You might start going down on him with lots of horny gusto. After five or six minutes, though, it might not feel arousing anymore. You can be a trooper and keep going - but it’s completely up to you.
And maybe you want to throw a little variety in there. After using your mouth for a couple of minutes, you might want to titfuck him, stroke him off, climb on his cock for a ride, or straddle his face to get some oral of your own.
Wrapping your lips around his cock isn’t a contract - you don’t have to keep going until he’s done.
You can use your hands when your mouth starts to get sore.
You can get on his dick and fuck him until he comes instead of blowing him all the way there.
You can suck him for a while and then ask him to jerk himself off to completion while you enjoy the show.
Or you can just tap out whenever you want to.
Giving great head isn’t just about duration. It can last seven minutes or it can be over in two. It can make him come or just make him really hard. It can give him deep sexual satisfaction or leave him wanting more.
Get Some of That Sloppy Gag Spit
A wetter blowjob is a better blowjob.
That’s just a fact.
But some people will insist that there’s only one way to make a cock properly wet.
Gagging on it.
That’s how you get the good spit. Not the regular saliva that any girl can drool out. This is the thick, slick, sloppy saliva you can only get by taking his cock so far back in your mouth that your eyes start to water.
If you don’t mind triggering your gag reflex, then you can definitely do that. If you’re turned on by deepthroating, even better.
But there’s a super simple way to get a dick sloppy wet that doesn’t involve any gagging at all.
Flavored lube is the perfect solution for non-gaggers. It makes the blowjob wetter and it tastes really good too - way better than plain avocado dick.
Most of the time, you don’t even need it. You can give an embarrassingly messy blowjob with just your regular spit.
And if you wish you could make more, you can hit your tongue with a dose of Mouthwatering Spray. That’ll make you drool like you’ve just seen the dessert cart and it won’t even make your eyes water.
I don’t know why there are so many people who are so eager to tell women they need to make themselves gag on a cock to get it slick but don’t even mention that flavored lube exists. I just know I don’t trust their blowjob advice.
The Blowjob Should Be Good for You Too
You probably noticed a theme with these bad blowjob tips.
They’re all about the guy’s pleasure.
Like, yeah, that makes sense to some extent. It’s not going to be a great blowjob unless he finds it hot and pleasurable.
But it should absolutely be enjoyable for you too.
Partly, that’s for his sake - you can’t give enthusiastic head if you’re having a miserable time doing it. And you won’t be quick to give a repeat performance if you just want it to be over and done with.
It’s also for your sake. You’re part of the blowjob and it should be fun for everyone involved.
Discovering new ways to suck a cock is awesome. Trying new techniques can be really exciting. But I highly recommend ignoring advice from anyone who doesn’t take your experience, comfort, or boundaries seriously. It’s just going to give you more blowjob anxiety - and nobody needs that.
You’re so much better off sucking him however you want. Make it super playful and sexy. Get yourself excited to slobber all over his dick. That’s the best way to become a blowjob queen.
This post contains affiliate links to some delicious flavored lubes and some handy dandy Mouthwatering Spray. If you click on one and treat yourself to anything from the site, I earn a small commission and you’ll be one step closer to sucking dick like a pro! Use the code LOVEEMMA to get 10% off your entire order from Condomania!
If you liked this article, you should totally check out the A Lil’ Chat About Pubic Hair (Cute Bushes, Shaved Balls, and Dick Mullets) episode of my dirty and intimate sex podcast, Pillow Talk With Emma Austin!
