The One Thing That's Keeping You From Having Much Better Sex
No, it’s not communication
I’ve always wanted to be super cute so I could be more fuckable.
Or maybe I wanted to be extremely fuckable so I could feel cute.
I dunno. It’s really hard to pick those two apart. Either way, I didn’t exactly succeed at either.
Still, it was a nice fantasy to slip into. To think of what it might be like to be so attractive and alluring that everyone has the urge to get in your pants.
There was one important thing I didn’t actually realize, though.
Trying too hard to be cute might make more people want to fuck you. But it could also get in the way of being someone who’s really fun to fuck.
How to Be a Way Hotter Fuck in One Simple Step (Not Clickbait)
I won’t lie, I noticed this in guys long before I noticed it in women.
A guy can be smoldering hot. He can be so charming and confident you almost forget how to speak around him.
He can have all those things and all the other qualities that draw you to him - and fucking him can still be boring and disappointing.
And it’s not necessarily because he doesn’t have the right moves - though it always helps if he’s really good at eating pussy.
It’s not because of his dick size, his physical stamina, or how long he can go before blowing his load.
It’s because he doesn’t drop the act, even after he’s dropped his dick.
That cool, confident guy is still trying to be all chill while he’s fucking you - and it’s just not having the right kind of effect.
For women, it’s not usually being quiet that’s a problem. It’s trying to look attractive and at least somewhat ladylike.
She could be getting bent back like a pretzel and fucked hard. She could be stuffing a dick in her mouth. She could be moments away from taking a cumshot somewhere on her lovely body.
But the entire time, she’s trying to be cute.
No matter how good it feels, she can’t shut down the part of her brain that’s trying to make sure she keeps a little bit of composure while she’s enjoying herself.
And that’s not unusual. Trying to keep yourself somewhat put together while you’re fucking is a normal thing to do. But it’s also one of the things that’s keeping most people from being better in bed.
Which is great, because it means being a better fuck is really simple.
All you have to do is let go.
Stop trying to be composed and start being the weird horny animal you are.
Don’t think too much about it - just let your dirtiest instincts take over.
Run your mouth and say whatever dumb, filthy thing pops into your head.
Let all the groans, grunts, and weird sounds come out of your throat instead of suppressing them.
Don’t worry about drooling, that your hair might get messed up, or how you must look with your body splayed out in whatever fucking position you’ve bent yourself in.
Being chill is alright. Being cute is fun. But when you hold back like that during sex, you’re missing out on a hotter and more pleasurable experience.
You’ll Become Their Dirty Fantasy
If doing some really dirty stuff with your guy turns you on, you probably won’t have much of a problem getting him on board.
He’ll almost certainly be eager to slide his cock in your ass instead of your pussy. There’s a really good chance he’ll happily lick your asshole too.
If you want him to cover your face with his come, he’ll probably be game to blast you with it. And if your dirty fantasy involves swallowing his load instead, he’ll be more than happy to pump your mouth with as much spunk as he can manage.
Doing dirty stuff isn’t a problem for most guys.
Saying dirty stuff, though, that’s another story.
A lot of guys get really quiet when they fuck. They won’t say much, if anything at all. Even when you ask them to be more verbal, some of them are too uncomfortable to even try it.
And the sex just isn’t as hot because of it.
It just feels too restrained. Even if his face is buried between your cheeks and his tongue is slobbering all over your asshole, being a quiet fuck is going to make him seem inhibited.
A lot of guys just don’t want to be heard during sex. And a lot of women don’t want to be seen.
At least, that’s the big complaint I keep coming across.
She’s super happy to get in bed and fuck, but gets incredibly bashful if she feels too exposed.
She doesn’t like masturbating while her partner watches, even if they’re already deep into the foreplay and have been touching each other for a while.
There are sex positions she won’t do. Not because they don’t feel good but because she worries about how she looks with her body bent and folded in certain ways.
And he doesn’t really know what her asshole looks like because there’s no way she’ll let him spread her ass and take a good look at it - even though he really fucking wants to.
The really sad part is that a lot of people aren’t letting themselves be uninhibited because they’re worried about being unattractive. And it completely backfires because letting go while fucking is exactly what makes you extra hot.
It Fucks Your Routine - And Fucks It Hard
Letting go also keeps your sex life from becoming way too routine.
I can tell you from experience that it doesn’t matter how good someone’s moves are. It doesn’t matter how many times they can make you come. If you know every single step they’re going to take, the sex is going to get real boring real fast.
I just don’t have a high enough sex drive for predictable sex. It’s not enough to excite me.
I love reliable orgasms as much as the next gal, but I need a few surprises too. I need to feel like I’m getting fucked by someone who is doing stuff to me because they’re horny for it, not because they’re running through a sex checklist.
That’s one of the reasons fucking like a horny animal is so much better. There’s no predictability.
You just go with whatever dirty idea pops into your head and see where it takes you.
And when you really let go, it feels a lot less routine because you have so much more to work with.
You can fuck the same way twice and it feels fresh because the dirty talk is completely new and improvised.
You don’t fall into nearly as many sex ruts because there are so many more sex acts in your comfort zone once you stop caring what you look or sound like.
It makes the sex hot and keeps it hotter for so much longer.
It’s About More Than Clits and Cocks
I think one of the reasons a lot of people hold back during sex is because they don’t realize it makes such a big difference.
You can give a lot of stimulation without acting like a filthy little fuckgremlin.
You can keep your grunting to a minimum and still lick her pussy until she’s had four orgasms from it.
You can ride him in a very ladylike fashion and make him come just fine.
You can give each other pleasure, have a bunch of orgasms, and it’s all good.
But it’s not as good as it could be.
And you feel that difference as soon as you start really letting go during sex.
You’ll still have all that sexual stimulation - though you’ll probably actually end up getting more. You’ll still have an orgasmic finish - though it might be more explosive.
But it also turns sex into an intense emotional experience.
It doesn’t just get you off. It gets you fucked in a way that makes you feel desired.
It also gives you a chance to tap into your dirtiest desires and actually express them, which feels fucking amazing.
And it feels incredibly passionate. Because that’s exactly what it is. It’s not just dirty sex and filthy talk - it’s two people getting lost in their deep, horny, animalistic feelings.
That’s incredibly beautiful. But it’s really hard to tap into it if you’re too worried about being weird or ugly.
Everyone Loves a Hot Mess
Not caring about how messy you get helps you fuck better, which is obviously great.
But there’s also the fact that going from cute to messy is really fucking hot.
There’s a reason so many women fantasize about rough sex. It’s not just because it feels good to get pounded hard - though it definitely can. It’s not just because we’re all kinky little brats who like getting choked by guys we trust - though some of us are.
I think the big reason is that making a guy who is normally cool and collected turn into an animal makes you feel sexy as hell.
I don’t know about everyone else, but I don’t just fantasize about being the girl who gets fucked by some hot dude. I fantasize about driving him so wild that he can’t hold back.
That’s the fucking fantasy right there. For the chill guy in the rolled up dress shirt sleeves to turn into a sweaty, grunting animal because of how horny you made him.
And it works both ways.
Most guys don’t just want to stick their dicks in a cute girl. They want to have a big effect on her. They want to do things to her that make her lose her fucking mind.
Getting a girl so turned on that she doesn’t really care that she’s turning into a hot mess is - well, it’s fucking hot.
Pleasuring her so well she makes faces she normally wouldn’t make. Doing things to her so she makes the kinds of sounds she hopes to never hear herself make. That’s the kind of thing that doesn’t just make you feel like you’re having sex - it makes you feel like you’re an incredible fuck.
It’s one of the reasons porn sites like Evil Angel are still going strong. Partly it’s because the sex is rough and nasty. Partly it’s because they’re not afraid to push the limit of how much someone can fit in themselves. But it’s also because seeing a girl go from cute to a complete mess isn’t embarrassing - it’s arousing.
When she’s drooled so much you worry someone might slip in it. When her hair is a frazzled mess. When her makeup is smeared and running. When she’s so sweaty she’s glowing like a freshly fucked angel. That’s when she looks like she really let go.
That makes her look like she’s had a really intense fuck. It makes her look like she was incredibly fun to fuck too.
And what could be better than that?
Get Nasty
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be cute.
I love it - feeling cute is awesome. And girls who pull off looking and acting cute make me weak.
But there’s a time and a place for trying to look good, cute, and composed. And I don’t think it’s during sex.
Once there are fingers, toys, and cock inside me, it’s not time to worry about how I look anymore - it’s time to let go and be nasty, sloppy, and fun.
At least, that’s what I’ve been trying to do. It doesn’t always work. Sometimes, I can’t shut off that part of my brain.
But when I do, that’s when the sex is really fucking hot, incredibly passionate, and so satisfying it makes me wish I could live in that horny mental space forever.
Fuck holding back. Next time you’re having sex, just let go and let your horny lizard brain take over.
You’ll say some really stupid shit. You’ll be as exposed as you’ve ever been. You’ll look and act sloppy. You’ll make sounds that would embarrass you in any other context. And you’ll love every single moment of it.
This post contains affiliate links to Evil Angel. If you click on one and treat yourself to a membership, I earn a small commission and you’ll be getting access to some hard, rough, and intense porn! And be sure to use my affiliate link to get a seriously discounted price!
If you liked this article, you should totally check out the Add a Little Bit of Spice (Introducing BDSM, Kinky Toys, and Sexy Helplessness) episode of my dirty and intimate sex podcast, Pillow Talk With Emma Austin!
