This Is the Only Kind of Dick Measuring Contest I’m Into (Jerk Buddies Review)

My review of Jerk Buddies

I’m no stranger to watching guys getting dirty. But I don’t often watch them getting dirty with each other.

Solo vids, definitely. I’ve logged hours watching hot guys touching themselves while talking dirty to me. At least, I like to pretend it’s me they’re getting off to.

I’ll peep at dudes who are playing with strokers and fucking sex dolls, too. As long as they’re moaning and saying nasty stuff, I’m there for it.

If you want to throw a girl in the mix, that’s more than fine by me. A guy showing a lady a very good time is just quality entertainment.

Make it multiple guys, even. Two or three fellas working a gal over is its own very special kind of hotness.

But even though I enjoy watching guys in porn, it had been a while since I went looking for guys banging other guys.

This time, I didn’t have to go looking at all. It landed right in my lap - on the front page of Adult Time.

It was the first video in their new series, Jerk Buddies. And it’s like it designed specifically to entice me.

I’m really into porn scenes with reluctance. It really turns me on to see someone get so horny that they’ll give into something they didn’t think they wanted. And because Jerk Buddies is all about straight seduction, I knew that’s exactly what I’d get.

I was helpless to resist it. My finger slid across the touchpad on my laptop like it was pushing the indicator on a Ouija board. I had no choice - I needed to see how straight guys get each other off.

I’m really glad I was compelled to click, because everything I saw over the next 40 minutes really turned me on.

Just Guys Doing Guy Stuff

Normally, I hate when guys get into dick measuring contests.

Guys trying to prove they’re better than each other. Cocky dudes who feel the urge to brag and show off. It’s awkward, obnoxious, and unattractive.

But it turns out that when guys bust out the ruler and actually measure their dicks, it doesn’t bother me at all.

In fact, it’s really fucking hot.

That’s what happens in NO WAY Your Dick Is Bigger, Bruh. It stars Isaac Parker and Jay Tee as two young guys who are studying to become accountants.

But studying sucks and it’s boring them to tears. So, they start talking about sports and girls instead. Guy stuff, I guess.

They make plans to bring their girlfriends over on the weekend and Jay suggests getting a foursome going. Isaac’s weirded out by the idea, but Jay tells him there wouldn’t be any guy-on-guy dick touching or anything like that.

“No homo,” he reassures him.

And maybe there would be no homo, except Jay mentions that he tried to fuck his girlfriend recently but she couldn’t take it. His dick is just too big for her.

Isaac doesn’t buy it - not one bit. If Jay wants to claim that he’s got an anaconda for a trouser snake, he’s going to have to prove it.

But they’re not ready to drop dick just yet. They have to set some ground rules first. If they’re going to measure their cocks, it’s got to be in a totally straight way.

They agree to turn away from each other so they can have just a smidge of privacy while getting themselves hard.

Their dicks are practically stiff by the time they pull them out of their shorts, but that doesn’t stop them from stroking, and stroking, and stroking. Stroking so much that they’re starting to really feel themselves.

That’s when the peeking starts.

I totally get it. It would be hard to hold back for that long - anyone would get curious. And these boys get curious multiple times.

The peeking turns to watching, and we get a nice stretch of these two dudes slowly jerking off and admiring each other’s cocks.

They almost seem to forget why they were doing it in the first place. And that’s totally fine because I’m in no rush for them to stop. These two guys slowly pleasuring themselves has my complete and total attention.

When the ruler makes its appearance, we find out that Jay’s dick is bigger than Isaac’s. An inch longer, to be precise. About half an inch thicker, too.

And I guess Isaac is a fan of big cocks, because he can’t stop staring at Jay’s dick like he’s totally mesmerized by it. He clearly wants to do more with it, but he’s also way too shy to admit it.

Luckily, he doesn’t have to. Jay offers his cock up to him and before long, Isaac’s got it in his mouth.

Jay’s got a slightly cocky attitude, but he still dishes out plenty of good praise too. Mainly about Isaac’s surprisingly good straight guy blowjob skills and his cute bubble butt.

But if I learned anything from this video, it’s that praise will only get you so far. If you want a straight guy to fool around with another guy, you’ve got to challenge him.

That’s how Jay gets Isaac to throat him. His girlfriend can hold his cock in deep for about five seconds, and he wants to see if Isaac could beat her.

It’s also how he gets to blow Isaac in return. After all, they’ve got to see if Jay can beat Isaac’s new deep dick sucking record.

And it’s how Jay turns things around when Isaac is about to change his mind about getting fucked.

He’s on his knees, bent over the arm of the couch, back arched and ready - then has a moment of heterosexual hesitation. But when Jay reminds him that his girlfriend couldn’t take his cock, Isaac doubles down. “Well, if it’s a competition, I’ll beat Emily every day.”

He gets back into position and proves it. Emily might not be able to take Jay’s thick dick, but Isaac definitely can. Slowly at first - it’s his first time, after all. But eventually he’s getting it hard enough for us to hear their bodies slapping.

He takes it like a pro - from behind, riding on top, and finally in missionary.

And the whole time, they stay perfectly in character. No matter how he’s taking it, Isaac is still playing the shy straight guy who can’t really admit to himself that he might not be so straight. Meanwhile Jay is the one confidently leading things along and dishing out some dirty talk.

The more comfortable they get, the sweeter they are too. By the time Isaac comes all over his stomach and Jay pulls out to cover him with even more come, they’re starting to get more lovey.

I’m not all that invested in dick size, but I’m really happy these two decided to measure theirs. If a dick measuring contest is what it takes to get a straight guy to experiment a little, then I’m all for it.

Sexual Experimentation Will Always Be Hot

Jerk Buddies is off to an amazing start. And this scene has so many things that just work for me.

You’ve got one person who wants something new, but is too shy to fully admit it. They still end up getting what they really want because someone else is gently escalating and moving things along.

That’s basically a perfect dynamic.

And they carried it out really well. Instead of rushing through everything, there was enough reluctance and nervousness to create a lot of buildup and tension. There was lots of communication too, so even though this was a straight seduction scene the consent was all there on screen.

I might not have watched a lot of guy on guy porn, but I have a feeling that’s going to change. At the very least, I know I’ll be clicking on the next Jerk Buddies scene as soon as it comes out.

This post contains affiliate links to Jerk Buddies. If you click on one and treat yourself to a membership, I earn a small commission and you’ll be getting access to tons of incredibly hot smut! And be sure to use the code LOVEEMMA when you sign up to get a great deal on your membership!

If you liked this article, you should totally check out the Speed Up Your Sex Drive (Get Horny and Get It On) episode of my dirty and intimate sex podcast, Pillow Talk With Emma Austin!