Why You Shouldn't Buy Sex Toys From Amazon

It’s not worth the risk

I used to buy sex toys from Amazon, but I’ve since learned my lesson.

I consider myself a fairly frugal person, so can’t resist the allure of Amazon Prime.

I was drawn to the free shipping, fast delivery, and low prices. But once I moved to a town so small it only had two traffic lights, it became a lifeline.

I couldn’t buy everything I wanted locally. I relied on my Prime membership for everything from socks and laptops to lip liner and peanut butter in bulk to feed my sandwich-obsessed kids.

And sex toys, too.

I checked out a few online sex shops I had heard of and founds lots of toys that I really wanted to try. But I couldn’t justify the cost. My husband had just started working and we were still paying off our moving expenses. So, like any horny broke girl, I looked for similar toys on Amazon.

I saved quite a bit of money, but I also learned a lesson. Turns out you really do get what you pay for.

My experience buying sex toys from Amazon was mixed. Some of them were fine. Not amazing or anything, but they did the job.

Others were even more disappointing because they broke soon after I got them.

Once I started buying from actual sex toy retailers, I noticed how much better the products were. Even the more affordable sex toys were well built and really fun to play with.

I didn’t look back. I kept my Prime membership to stock the pantry and patiently wait for a second season of The Wilds. But I stopped using it to buy things that will go anywhere near my pussy.

And the more I learned about sex toy sales on Amazon, the more I was convinced I’d never get another vibrator or dildo from the site.

If you’re considering buying sex toys from Amazon, these are some of the reasons you should think twice.

Counterfeit Products Are a Major Problem

One of the biggest reasons you should avoid ordering sex toys from Amazon is that you might not actually get the product you thought you were ordering.

I’ve read multiple stories from people who ordered a product that was listed as a Hitachi Magic Wand, or a Lelo vibrator, or a genuine Fleshlight and got a low-quality dupe instead.

In some cases, it only takes a quick glance to know you’re not going to get the toy you went shopping for. Other times, though, it’s subtle enough to fool you.

This happened to me before. The product would be listed as if it was manufactured or sold by a recognizable brand, but then I’d get a toy that had something off about it. Either it didn’t quite look like it did in the product photo or the it came in crummy packaging that didn’t even have the company’s name or logo on it.

I’m hoping Amazon has started craking down on this, because I had more trouble finding counterfeit products when I searched the site this week. But there were definitely some knock-offs still floating around.

This listing for a stroker that looks very cheaply made, for example, uses the word Fleshlight twice, but the name of the product itself is incredibly sketchy.

Nice try, but I’ll be buying my “Man Sucker Underwear” somewhere else.

More worrisome is this listing I found for a Vibratex Magic Wand Massager.

Other than the fact that it’s listed under Vibratex, which is an official distributor of the Magic Wand but not the manufacturer (that would be Hitachi), it looks fairly legit.

But it only looks that way because the seller ripped off official product photos. Scroll down to the customer reviews and you’ll see complaints about the product being a shoddy knockoff. One reviewer even shared a photo that showed a side-by-side comparison with the legitimate product.

So yeah, even when a product looks genuine, it’s not worth the risk of getting something other than the toy you wanted.

The Reviews Are Often Fake

My husband is a freelance writer. He has stable clients now, but he started off the way a lot of people do - refreshing online job boards looking for work.

He’s seen some of the sketchy corners of online writing. He’s been asked to rewrite popular self-help books so they can be passed off under someone else’s name. He’s had wannabe real estate influencers ask him to edit posts that were copy/pasted from the Zillow blog.

And every once in a while, someone would reach ask him to write Amazon reviews.

They weren’t for any product in particular and he wouldn’t get to actually use the product. It was bulk work. The idea was that they’d give him a long list of links, he would click on each, scan the product page quickly, leave five stars, and write a few rave sentences before moving to the next one.

He turned down every single one of those jobs. But other people took them. And there’s no shortage of companies you can hire to get positive reviews on your Amazon listing.

So, rave reviews don’t necessarily mean it’s a high-quality sex toy. The reviewers might not have even tried it.

That means even a full-blown knock-off can have good reviews. Don’t let the 4.3 star rating fool you - it might still be a complete rip-off.

Returns Are an Issue

There are two problems when it comes to returns on Amazon.

One is that you probably won’t actually be able to return your product if you buy it.

Amazon’s list of “Items that Can’t be Returned” includes “Some health and personal care orders.” And from what I’ve seen online, that usually includes sex toys.

That’s understandable. But it’s also a problem. If you get a bogus sex toy, you can’t return it. And whether you get a refund is up to the seller, which often means you won’t get one.

But the worst part is that there are anecdotal stories of people who have actually managed to return sex toys they ordered through Amazon. Because there’s nothing stopping sellers from packing up those returned toys and sending them off to other customers.

There are stories floating around online from people who strongly suspect that happened to them. They purchase a toy from Amazon and see tell-tale signs of use. Either the toy looked worn, the packaging had clearly been opened, or had some lube residue on it.

Not cool.

It’s not sanitary, that’s for sure. But it also comes with some added risks. One study, for instance, found that vibrators used by women who have vaginal HPV came up positive on swab tests, even after the toys had been cleaned.

Getting a used sex toy is disappointing enough. Getting an STI from it would be downright horrible.

The Materials Aren’t Always Body Safe

There’s a reason so many sex toys are made of silicone. It’s not the cheapest material, but it’s durable, feels great to the touch, and it’s body safe.

A lot of cheaper sex toys will be made of materials like TPE, which has some wonderful qualities. It’s really soft and pleasant to the touch, which makes it a really good material for sex dolls. It gives the fake tits a very attractive bounce and fake butts a very nice jiggle.

But TPE is also porous. That means it can never be as clean as a sex toy you put in your pussy should be.

The toy might look clean, though you might eventually notice discoloration or an unpleasant smell. But all the pores in it are hotbeds for bacterial buildup.

I’m a really big fan of soft dildos, and a TPE one would definitely be soft. But I wouldn’t risk baceterial infection when I can get lots of soft, bendy ones that are made from silicone instead.

Some products will be listed as body safe, but unfortunately that’s not a label you can trust.

One of my most memorable Amazon sex toy purchases was a dildo that said it was body safe. But I couldn’t trust it.

It was suspiciously affordable but the product page said it was made of silicone so I figured it was fine. When I actually got it, though, it didn’t look like it was silicone. In fact, it seemed to be made of at least two separate materials, and whatever the outer layer was made of, it was already peeling and chipping.

I never got to fuck myself with it. I threw it out because I knew better than to put that thing anywhere near my sensitive bits.

The Toys Are Often Cheaply Made

Sex toy dupes wouldn’t be the worst thing if they actually worked well. But they usually don’t.

Even the ones that are actually body safe aren’t usually designed very well.

A lot of the toys I bought from Amazon stopped working soon after I got them. Judging from what I’ve read online, that’s an extremely common problem. Even when they work, lots of people end up with toys that can barely hold a charge.

Even the ones that work don’t usually work well.

Some don’t have a great shape. They might be difficult to insert. Some won’t hit your G-spot as well as they’re supposed to.

Most vibrators have a few different settings so you can find one that works well for your clit. But a lot of the ones I got from Amazon didn’t have a good range. Either all the settings were too weak or way too intense.

And that’s not just me. Amazon sex toy reviews are full of women complaining that the toy they bought was so strong it made them numb before they could come.

Strokers are a problem, too. There are plenty of complaints that some are so small or tight that it’s really hard to fit your cock into them. And that’s the whole point of a stroker.

That’s not a complaint I’ve heard elsewhere. If you have a massive cock, there are a few toys you might struggle with. But most dicks can fuck most pocket pussies without any problem - unless it’s a really cheaply made one.

Your Toy Won’t Be Under Warranty

Because i review sex toys, I regularly receive boxes of them. And once in a while, there’s some kind of defect.

I received a masturbation sleeve that melted and warped somewhere on its way to me.

I had a squirting dildo that wasn’t perforated all the way through so the fake come couldn’t actually shoot out the other side.

I got a vibrator that stopped turning on after a couple of uses.

Those problems are rare, but they happen. And every single time, I just had to send a single email to get a new item sent to em.

Most legit companies have warranties in place to make sure you get as much enjoyment out of your toy as you should.

Usually you’ll get a one-year warranty. Sometimes it’ll be a bit longer. And that’s a big deal because sex toys are a really fucking good investment, but they don’t come cheap. Even the more affordable ones can set you back a bit.

That warranty means you won’t have to worry about wasting your money. But if you get a sex toy from an Amazon seller, you don’t necessarily have the same protection.

The Lubes Are Terrible

Some toys come with a sample pack of lube. It’s a great little perk.

I didn’t usually get lube when I bought sex toys from Amazon. When I did, though, it was the worst lube I’ve ever tried.

It was usually a water-based lube that got tacky almost as soon as I applied it. It was practically useless.

On top of that, they always contained glycerin, which is a common ingredient in cheap lubes but can also increase your risk of getting a yeast infection or bacterial vaginosis.

So, a big no thanks to that.

The last time I got lube with an Amazon order, I gave it to Mr. Austin. He’s not as fussy as I am. Within a few days, I found the bottle in the trash.

It was so sticky and had to be reapplied so often that it really killed the mood while he was stroking off.

Everyone should own a few bottles of lube so they can make sex and masturbation more pleasurable, a hell of a lot easier, and tastier too. Just make sure you’re using the good stuff.

You Deserve Better Sex Toys

A lot of people default to Amazon for anything they want to buy. So, that’s the first place they look when they want a new sex toy.

They’ll type something like “vibrator” in the search bar and browse the products that come up. Or they’ll do what I’ve done and search for a specific brand name and settle on whatever cheap alternative is available instead.

I figured those would be more or less the same thing, like when I buy generic dish soap instead of the brand name. But it was a lot more like when your parents tell you they won’t stop at McDonald’s because they can make Happy Meals at home. It’s not even close to the real thing.

If you’re not sure where to start shopping, here are some of the companies I love. They’re the ones I use personally and feel great about recommending..

My favorite online sex shop is Betty’s Toy Box. It’s the first place I look whenever I need anything. I love their selection and I’ve always had great service from them.

I’ll also occasionally shop from their Canadian sister site, Naughty North. And if I want something on the kinkier side, I’ll check out the BDSM gear on Naughty Betty’s.

My vibrator purchases have been all over the place, but I haven’t found one that beats the Sultry by Pillow Talk. It’s versatile, soft, supple, and smooth.

It took me a long time to find a good clit sucking toy that I could enjoy. Now I have one and I can’t stop recommending it. It’s the Aer by Dame and it’s perfect even if you’re totally new to this type of toy.

For dildos, I’ve been very impressed by King Cock. They’re gorgeously realistic, feel great, and have cool features like swinging balls, retractable foreskins, or some jizz-tastic squirting.

I also love the Party Marty dildo. Not just because it’s got a fun confetti design, but beacuse it’s soft and bendable, which makes it really comfortable to fuck.

My favorite all-purpose lube is Sliquid Sassy. It’s designed for anal play, but it’s safe for any use. It’s a water-based lube but it’s thicker than most, longer lasting, and very slippery.

For flavored lube, though, my favorites are the ones in the Jo Gelato and Jo Candy Shop lines. I use the Cotton Candy flavor the most, but I’ll reach for the Mint Chocolate one if I’m in the mood for something different.

All my favorite BDSM gear is by Sportsheets. I love their Under the Bed Restraint System the most. It’s discreet, convenient, and I use it almost every single time I have sex. I’m also really fond of their paddles and crops - they spank with just the right intensity.

For strokers, you can’t go wrong with Fleshlight. I bought the Pink Lady Stamina Trainer for my husband and it quickly became his favorite way to get off.

I’m also really fond of Tenga toys. They’re perfect for anyone who prefers a cock toy that doesn’t look like a pussy or anyone who just wants to try something cool. Mr. Austin especially enjoys the Tenga Flip.

I highly recommend buying sex toys from companies that specialize in making or selling them instead of relying on Amazon. You’ll end up with better products, more reliable service, and better orgasms.

I’m still going to use my Prime membership to order socks. But when I want something that goes in my pussy or that’s supposed to make me come, I’ll get it from somewhere a lot more reliable.

This article contains some affiliate links. If you click on one (or click here) and treat yourself to anything, I earn a small commission and you’ll be enjoying some high-quality sexual stimulation! Use the code LOVEEMMA at checkout on Betty’s Toy Box, Naughty North, or Naughty Betty’s to get 15% off your entire order!

If you liked this article, you should totally check out the My Clit Sucking Conversion (Orgasmic Exorcisms and Masturbating to Failure) episode of my dirty and intimate sex podcast, Pillow Talk With Emma Austin!