How to Ruin Him for the Other Girls
Do these seven things men wish women did in bed
There’s a myth about men that I keep encountering over and over.
Lots of people will say that women’s sexuality is complex, complicated, and multifaceted. But then insist that men are incredibly simple when it comes to sex.
They want, at most, three or four things out of sex. They want to stare at some tits. They want spontaneous mid-afternoon blowjobs. They want to fuck to completion. Most of them seem really keen on anal, too.
And yeah, true, lots of guys would love an impromptu blowjob and a chance to put it up her butt.
It’s just that there are a lot of other things they need to feel like they’re having amazing sex.
There are a few reasons this myth of the sexually simple guy keeps getting spread.
I hear it a lot from men who have higher sex drives than their partners. They’re feeling pent up, desperate for sex, and just wish they could get laid more. Their desires feel simple to them. All they want is sex - any sex they can get.
But the other reason is that men don’t always have a clear understanding of their own desires.
They know when they feel bored by their partner, but they’re not always sure why they’re losing interest. They can tell something’s missing, but can’t pinpoint what that something is.
The sex they’re having is nothing like the sex they fantasize about, but they have trouble articulating what it would take to turn them on more and get them off better.
If you’re with a guy like that, it puts you in a tricky position. You want to excite him like no one else does. You want to turn him on so much you stay on his mind. You want to give him the kind of mindblowing sex that makes him feel lucky to be with you.
You’re just not exactly sure how to give him that.
This is a good place to start. These are some of the things most men wish their partners would do more in bed - even if they don’t realize it.
Expose Yourself to Him More
Women are hot. Naked women are even hotter.
That’s simple enough. But the problem is that a lot of women are very timid when it comes to showing their bodies, myself very much included.
Getting half-naked for sex is easy. Fucking under blankets is a piece of cake. Banging in the dark is super safe.
But I’m not just talking about being naked - I’m talking about being fully exposed.
He doesn’t just want you to undress - he wants to see all of you and see it clearly.
If you really want to get him excited, give him exactly that.
Fuck with the lights on, even if you keep them dim.
Get completely undressed. I spent years fucking with my shirt on and even though it’s a cute look, he’ll get far more excited if he can see all of you.
I personally think you can keep your socks on, though. Your partner’s preferences may vary, but if your tits, stomach, pussy, ass, and thighs are bare, you’re good.
And exposing yourself is about more than just showing skin. It’s about the way you position yourself and how much you really let him see.
If you really want to drive him wild, get in all the positions that make you feel vulnerable. Spread your legs wide for him. Go face down, ass up and let him get a good look at you. Lie down comfortably on the bed, without using your arms to cover yourself up.
And don’t be afraid to show off a little.
Strip for him. Give him a tit drop and ask him if he likes what he sees. Bend over to show him your ass in its full glory.
Flaunt what you have and act like you know you’re hot - because you will be when you do.
Give Him Playful, Experimental Blowjobs
Blowjobs can be really simple if you want them to be. All you have to do is bob your head on his cock for however long you want, and you’ve successfully given head.
And that’s really good. I hear it feels great and most guys won’t complain about having their dick in someone’s mouth.
But if you really want to impress him, it’ll take something a little more elaborate.
I don’t mean it has to be complicated or intense. It’s not really about technique. You don’t have to gag or take it all the way down to the balls. You don’t have to suck and slurp aggressively.
In fact, there’s no magic formula for giving a blowjob. The secret to giving a really good one is just to keep it fun.
Treat every blowjob like you’re experimenting and just trying things out.
Give him some slow, sensual suction. Use your tongue all over his cock. Take his balls in your mouth. Stroke his shaft while licking his head. Give him lots of shallow little sucks, then see how deep you can take him.
Try different positions. Have him stand while you get on your knees to blow him. Lie down next to him in bed and give him a long, comfortable suck. Climb on top of him for a good old fashioned sixty-nine.
If you want inspiration, watch amateur blowjob porn. You can learn from the professionals, too, but amateurs tend to have a lot more variety in their techniques.
It doesn’t really matter how you do it, though, as long as it doesn’t become predictable. Give him playful blowjobs, make them interesting, and keep him on his toes.
Get on Top and Ride Him
Guys love it when a girl gets on top during sex, and a lot of them complain that it doesn’t happen nearly as often as they wish it did.
I completely understand why.
For one thing, in a lot of relationships, it’s the guy who puts in a lot of the physical work during sex.
He’s thrusting, humping, pounding, and banging away. You’re doing some work, too, but if you’re in missionary, doggystyle, or spooning positions, he’ll be the one really working up a sweat.
When you get on top, he gets to have a break. He can recover in between positions, regain some energy, and feel ready to pound you even harder after you’re done.
It also lets him fully enjoy the moment. He can just sit back and enjoy the way your pussy feels without having to worry about anything else.
It’s a really fucking hot visual, too. Cowgirl means he gets to see your face while you’re experiencing some real pleasure, he gets to watch your tits bounce beautifully, and he gets to watch your thighs work. And reverse cowgirl lets him get a good look at your ass while he watches his cock slide into your pussy.
And because you’re in complete control of the speed, rhythm, and depth, being on top means you’re fucking in a way that really gets you off. He gets to watch you get lost in your pleasure in a way that he might not get to in other positions.
All of that is extremely hot and arousing for him. So, make sure you get on top if you really want to turn him on.
Use Your Filthy Little Mouth
Most women make noise during sex. We moan, we groan, we whimper. We make cute little sex noises that would turn anyone on.
But we don’t always say much.
We’ll say things like “yes,” “don’t stop,” and “holy fuck” when it gets really good. But a lot of us don’t let out full sentences.
And that’s too bad because it would drive our guys wild.
Dirty talk is fucking hot. It’s arousing. It shows a lot of enthusiasm. And because it’s so unladylike, hearing dirty things coming out of your sweet mouth can be extremely thrilling.
So, don’t hold back. Say whatever naughty things come to your mind.
Tell him what is turning you on. Tell him what feels really good. Tell him what you want him to do to you and what you want to do to him.
And don’t be afraid to get really filthy. Say all the nasty things you feel like saying.
I recently watched a porn scene with lines like “feed me that cock - I’m such a hungry slut” and “fuck me like a whore.” That’s advanced stuff. You don’t have to get quite that dirty. But if you do, it will definitely excite and encourage the guy you’re fucking.
Worship His Cock
Cock worship is just what it sounds like. You spend a little while making his cock the center of your attention.
It’s something guys are really into because even the ones who get plenty of sex still don’t often get a lot of enthusiastic physical admiration.
The way we talk about cocks doesn’t help, either. Cocks are treated as a completely functional thing. Guys know that we want their cocks. We want to touch them, suck them, and get fucked hard by them. But they’re also constantly given the message that dicks are ugly and unattractive.
That’s what makes cock worship so satisfying for them.
It’s not just the fact that you’re touching his cock, that you’re sucking it, and that you’re pleasuring it in different ways. He could experience that from handjobs and blowjobs.
What makes it different is the way you’re doing it.
Worshiping his cock means treating it lovingly, like you want to explore every inch of it and really get to know it.
It’s taking time to admire it, to look it over closely, to see the way it reacts to your touch and your tongue.
It’s complimenting it. Telling him what you love the most about his cock and why you appreciate it so much.
Most guys are at least somewhat insecure about their dicks. Giving them a bit of cock worship gives them some reassurance that their dick is more than fine just the way it is.
Touch Him a Whole Lot More
When guys complain about girls starfishing during sex, it’s really a complaint about a few different things.
In part, it’s because it makes sex kind of boring. It limits the kinds of positions you can do or the sex acts you can try.
It’s partly because it shows a lot less enthusiasm than arching your back, riding him hard, or moaning deeply.
But it’s also because guys want to be touched during sex.
They don’t talk about it often (unless you count touching their dicks), but it’s something that guys find really enjoyable.
He loves feeling your arms and legs wrap around him while you’re fucking him - like you’re trying to pull him in even deeper than he can go.
Or running your fingers in his hair while he’s going down on you.
Or gripping his shoulder while he’s making you come with his fingers.
All that physical touch makes him feel loved. It makes him feel appreciated. It makes him feel like you’re present with him. And sadly, that’s not something guys always get to feel during sex.
Make Him Feel Desired
One of the biggest complaints men have about sex is that their partners don’t initiate or don’t initiate often enough.
And women find that really fucking frustration because we know that we do. We prep for sex. We get flirty and play coy. We give him all sorts of green lights. And then he still complains that he’s the only one who initiates.
And yeah, a lot of times it’ because guys can be a bit dense when it comes to this kind of stuff. He might not notice all your subtle moves and think that he did all the work because he put his hand down your pants before you put your hand down his.
But a lot of times, there’s something else behind that complaint. He doesn’t you to initiate sex - he wants you to initiate it in a certain way.
Specifically, he wants you to do it in a way that makes him feel desired.
He doesn’t just want to know that you’re open to having sex or up for a fuck. He wants to know that you feel turned on because of him.
He doesn’t want a green light to do stuff to you - he wants you to be so into him that you’re the one hitting the accelerator.
He wants to feel attractive. He wants to feel like he’s driving you wild. He wants to know that you think dirty thoughts about him long before he’s started doing anything to your body.
If you do one thing to make him feel extremely sexually satisfied, it should be this.
Show him you’re hungry for him. Be eager instead of acting coy. Put the moves on him instead of showing him that you’re receptive to having sex.
Compliment him physically and sexually. Tell him he’s turning you on and why. Let him know what kind of naughty things you want to do to him and all the dirty things you want him to do to you.
Ride him like you can’t wait to have his cock inside you. Show lots of enthusiasm when you’re sucking him off. Beg him for more if you like being a bit submissive.
Keep flirting once sex has started. Tell him how much you want his cock even when it’s already inside you. And say some very nice things about him after you’re both spent and finished.
Men aren’t used to being desired so overtly. Making him feel wanted is going to leave him feeling incredibly happy and satisfied.
Give Him the Fuck of His Dreams
Men often claim their needs are extremely simple. But they really do want more than just a blowjob and a sandwich.
They have a lot of preferences. They have sexual needs that don’t always get met and desires that don’t get fulfilled.
Sometimes, they don’t get fulfilled because they struggle to articulate them.
So, don’t wait for him to ask for it. Give him the enthusiastic sex, the playful head, the filthy dirty talk, and the sweet compliments he secretly wants.
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If you liked this article, you should definitely listen to the Arousal Oil Sexperiment (We Try to Kickstart a 7-Day Fuckfest) episode of my dirty and intimate sex podcast, Pillow Talk With Emma Austin!
