Show Him How You Really Masturbate
It’s way hotter than you think
I had never heard of anybody masturbating the way I did.
So naturally, I figured I must be doing it wrong. Everyone was jilling off all graceful and cute - everyone except me and my weird masturbation method.
I knew how I got that way, too. It’s because I didn’t have anyone to imitate when I started getting myself off.
Like a lot of other girls, I was an early masturbation bloomer. But I didn’t know what it was supposed to look like because I’d never seen it. I don’t even think I knew what masturbation was - or that I was doing it.
I just knew what felt good - and grinding against stuff felt really fucking good.
I did it absent-mindedly at first. I was moving myself along the arm of the sofa and it was so pleasurable and comforting that I kept repeating the motion.
I had enough sense to know that something that pleasurable should be done in private, so I moved from riding the couch to doing the pillows in my bed. Then I figured out that my stuffed animals felt even better, especially the ones with firm snouts and hard noses.
So, I humped and humped. I did it when I couldn’t fall asleep. When I was too bored to do anything else. When I just needed to feel good.
Once I started having non-stop thoughts about sex, my humping habit intensified. I had all sorts of horny urges and I knew there was only one way to satisfy them - by finding something to grind against.
I did everything I could to satisfy my curiosity. When I had the house all to myself, I snuck peeks at the hardcore porn channels on the living room TV. I stole some of my mom’s erotic paperbacks and marked all the dirty parts. I rented every steamy movie I could get my hands on.
I loved all of it. Every piece of smut fascinated me. Most of it turned me on. Some of it kind of intimidated me.
And then I started feeling embarrassed. Because I felt like I was getting exposed to everything - oral, bondage, control play, exhibitionism, group action, girls getting it on with other girls.
Everything except grinding.
Girls didn’t hump in porn. They didn’t hump in movies, either. As far as I knew, they didn’t hump at all.
Instead, they laid on their backs. They spread their legs apart and slid their fingers down their panties. They rubbed their pussies while making seductive faces.
It was sexy as hell. Watching the way their hands moved was arousing. Seeing fingers sliding across wet lips was downright hypnotic.
And the more of it I saw, the weirder I felt about the way I was doing it. Because now I knew what masturbation was supposed to look like - and it didn’t look like what I did with my stuffed animals.
Until I landed myself a really serious boyfriend, anyway. Then all of a sudden, I was rubbing my pussy like all the other girls.
Touching Myself Like a Pornstar
I had finally met my match.
Not just a guy I could fall for. Not just someone I’d want to spend all my time with. Not just someone who made me feel loved like I’d never been loved before.
He was all that, but also a certified perv. He was into sex just as much as I was.
My soulmate, basically.
And for the first time, there was someone in my life that I didn’t want to hide anything from. I could let him see how obsessed I was with sex, because I knew he was too.
I never held back on a filthy comment or a dirty joke because I knew he’d find it funny too.
I could download a bunch of porn on his computer while he was at work, knowing he wouldn’t judge me for it.
We fooled around, experimented, and tried all sorts of stuff together. We both had filthy imaginations and knew it would be a shame to waste those.
There was just one thing I couldn’t do. I couldn’t bring myself to grind in front of him.
If I was on top of him, I could do it with no problem. I’d dryhump him eagerly when it was too risky to strip down and fuck. Climbing on top of him to press my pussy against his mouth or bounce on his cock embarrassed me a little, but not enough to stop me.
But just grinding myself to a climax while he watched - that was too much. I felt ashamed just thinking about it.
I thought about what he’d see. Me squirming awkwardly on top of a toy. My hips shifting in random directions. The side of my face squished into the mattress while my legs tensed and shook uncontrollably.
No matter how I imagined it, it wasn’t pretty.
And sure, I wanted to get off. But I also wanted to turn him on, not weird him out.
So whenever I wanted to give him a little show or masturbate in front of him, I faked it.
Not the pleasure. Not the orgasms, either. Just the method.
I did it the way I’d seen in movies and porn. Legs spread with fingers or a vibrator working my clit to a climax.
It felt great, but I knew it could be better. I could come so much harder if I was lying on my stomach and humping like I had done it forever.
But I couldn’t bring myself to do it. The shame got the best of me. No amount of pleasure would be worth that much embarrassment.
I kept that sham going for years. Unless I was all alone, I’d pull out the cute masturbation routine and pretend that’s just how I got myself off. Just like all the other girls.
Then one day, I just couldn’t take it anymore.
One Happy Humper
I didn’t plan for it to happen. It was supposed to be an ordinary night. Just some mutual masturbation between husband and wife. Lying side by side, touching ourselves, turning each other on while we’re getting ourselves off.
It’s hard to beat masturbating with the person you love. It’s super fucking hot and incredibly fun.
Except that night.
It started off just fine. I was playing with myself while listening to all the sounds Mr. Austin makes when he’s jerking off - the subtle moans, the hard breathing, the sloppy sound of his lubed up hand sliding along his cock.
It was perfect - until I started struggling.
I don’t know why, but my body wasn’t cooperating. I turned up the power on my vibrator, I added more lube, I started really going at it - nothing worked. I just couldn’t make myself come.
After a while, it got really frustrating. Instead of giving horny little moans, I was rage groaning. I just wanted to get off and I was worried I wouldn’t get to.
I could tell Mr. Austin was getting close to finishing. His moaning getting louder, his stroking more aggressive, his abs tensing.
I didn’t want to be left behind, still masturbating minutes after he covered his hand in sticky spunk. So, I pulled out the big guns - I flipped over on my stomach and started grinding my vibrator.
I was so desperate to come that I didn’t even think about it. I didn’t worry about how my ass and thighs might look while they’re flexing. I didn’t think twice about showing my husband I’m a secret humper.
I just rode my toy and enjoyed how intense and familiar it felt.
I came fast. I came hard. And I came before he did.
Once the orgasmic bliss started to fade away, I felt a little embarrassed. I had just let him see me in a way he’d never seen me before. My cheeks were flushed - half from the orgasm and half from the shame I couldn’t shake.
But I knew it wouldn’t matter. Grinding to an orgasm was so deeply satisfying, I knew I wouldn’t be going back.
No more trying to be cute. From now on, I’d masturbate however I wanted to - even if I had an audience.
And it’s been so fucking good.
I get more pleasure when we’re getting off together. I worked more grinding into the way we fuck, so I get better orgasms when we’re having sex too. And I didn’t have to make up excuses when I treated myself to a really fun sex pillow or a grinding vibe.
But it’s also nice not to have to hold back around him. I can get rid of the shame and feel like I can be myself a little more. And that’s made sex and mutual masturbation feel even more intimate than it’s ever been before.
Show Him the Real Deal
Don’t make the mistake I made. Don’t assume there’s something wrong with the way you get off because you’ve never seen anyone else do it that way.
There’s a good reason you’ve never seen it - and it’s not because it’s weird. It’s because the other stuff just films better.
In porn, spreading your legs and rubbing your pussy is very camera friendly. It’s like a lot of other popular porn positions - they show up often because they help you see everything.
In softcore erotic movies, it’s the right mix of explicit and discreet. You can see the hand moving and you know exactly where it’s going. You can watch the way it moves through the fabric of the underwear. Your imagination can easily fill all the details the camera can’t show you.
Plus, there’s all the intense eye contact you can do when masturbating like that. It’s great for dirty talk, too. Kind of hard to use your filthy mouth when it’s muffled in the comforter.
That’s why you don’t see a lot of humping and grinding - even though that’s how a lot of us discover sexual pleasure in the first place.
And it’s too bad we don’t see it more often. Because it’s not just common - it’s really arousing too.
If you go looking for it, you’ll find it. There are porn videos of women humping pillows. There are women grinding against each other. There are ladies lying on top of their vibrators and losing their damn minds because of it.
And it doesn’t look weird. It doesn’t look like they’re masturbating wrong. It just looks amazing.
So, don’t be shy about the way you get yourself off. If you’re going to masturbate in front of your guy, do it your way.
Lie on your side, tuck a pillow between your legs, and rub up against it.
Slip a vibrator under your hips and grind it hard.
Fuck yourself hard and fast with your most stimulating rabbit toy.
Use two dildos and a Magic Wand if that’s your jam.
Whatever it is, it’s going to feel incredible. Way better than letting shame cheat you out of the biggest orgasms you can give yourself.
And don’t worry about trying to look cute. No matter how you make yourself come, I guarantee you’ll look hot as hell doing it.
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If you liked this article, you should totally check out the Buttslut Bootcamp (12 Steps to Amazing Anal) episode of my dirty and intimate sex podcast, Pillow Talk With Emma Austin!
